Dealing with it

I'm finally watching those DVDs that I bought at a flea market in Bangkok. And, that was early this year, finally found the time and need to watch them. I think I'm slowly getting hooked to Grey's anatomy.

Probably, I need to do something to get my mind off thinking about him. Seeing my dad taking care of my mum, made me cry yesterday. Make me realised that there was someone who took really good care of me and now because of the huge differences between us, we were just not meant to be together.

Of all the guys that I have dated, which are not that many, he will always be the best. Probably because he's the most matured one. Maybe I'll resign before the next PTF starts again. For now, pretend to be just friends, stop looking at him in a special way. It's hard, harder that I need to curb those bubbling feelings inside. I think I've grown weak, I used to be so strong and independent. This is not planned, we are supposed to be just friends. If only he did not do that, maybe we will still stick to where we were, at least he did not know and I did not know. But it happened and it was so great.

I hate long weekends, I just can't wait for tomorrow to be over and I'll be back to work. To greet him " Hey Buddy!" with a big fake smile, if I get to see him on Tuesday.